I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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