Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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