and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
