She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
