Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
