If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
