Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
