2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
