Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Shitshow foam night was such a success
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
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