is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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