I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
