I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
