I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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