I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
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