her vagine was all disorganized.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
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