naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
