listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
