In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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