this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
