i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize