You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
