Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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