who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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