so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I just want nice things and good sex
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Randomize
