Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
