And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
