How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
