a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
