when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
