About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
