C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize