PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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