carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
