HIV tests are more positive than that guy
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Randomize
