the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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