Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Pants 0. Shit 1.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize