dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
kristin has been a bad kristin
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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