i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
