Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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