I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize