i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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