I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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