I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
