I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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