I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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