On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize