That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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