WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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