I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Randomize
