He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
