A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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